hello there!

I have not written for a while. Well, I'm not a writer, really. Busy days, not enough time at night to enjoy life. Feeling blue.

Amanda is going to go to Calico! They have room for her. We visited and she seemed to really like it. I hope they do pre-kindergarten stuff. I need to ask the lady there about that. Probably the most important thing and I didn't ask. Dork.

Ben had a rough couple of weeks at school but is now getting into it a little better. When we walked into Latchkey this morning, one of the other kids said "Hi! Mr. Spear!" and Ben got all kinds of mad. Instantly went into defensive mode. Which made me feel bad because the other kid was just being silly, I think.

I told Ben and the two boys who were there that they should be friends since they see each other every morning and afternoon at Latchkey. I told them that Ben could use some friends. I hope that wasn't overstepping my boundaries. Ben was being very stubborn. Maybe these kids tease him all the time and this was more of the same. I will have to talk to Ben about it tonight. Maybe at bedtime when everything's quiet and calm.

Rob is going out of town with his friend Mike to a trade show for family entertainment stuff. I bet it will be pretty cool! Plus, they are going to Philadelphia! Love Philly!

I hope I can get Amanda to bed at night when Rob is gone. Maybe I can get her into a better routine and get her some sleep at night, She's so tired all day! And she has homework from Kid's Country now. That's crazy!

I need to try to write here a little each day, like a diary. I wonder if I can do it on the iPad. Probably lots of typos on that thing. We shall see. I want a new laptop!!

fat

OMG! I think I need to make an entry video for "The Biggest Loser". Maybe I'd win! :) Lifestyle changes are due after vacation, methinks.

Ben is being very emotional lately. I wonder what is bothering him. Are there bullies at Day Camp? Does he just feel frustrated at too many changes in the day? My poor baby. I wish I could get inside his head for a day.

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The only thing I have to write about right now is that the band "Social Distortion" is coming to the Cleveland House of Blues in October (just in time for my BFF's birthday!) and I can not WAIT to go.

shoe fail!

Big Boy is learning to tie his shoes. He has trouble with holding the first loop together while wrapping the other tie around to pull through. You know what I'm talking about. He says, "I'm a failure because I can't do this!" And then he won't try again due to said failure. This is even after much encouragement and telling him that tying shoes or not doesn't make anyone a failure. That he's a success in our eyes just because he's ours. Anyhow, I don't REALLY give a hoot if he ever ties shoes again after he learns how, but he needs to know how to tie a knot or a bow for many other things than shoes.

Once he masters it, I have a sweet pair of Velcro close Skechers waiting for him - because they will "make me go fast!"

ok - nice changes

I really have no idea how to actually USE blogger. After all, I am the only one who reads this trash! :)

Not much going on. Let's recap last week.

Wednesday, April 25, my dearest friend and I went out to "Dinner and a Cause" at Bricco restaurant in Akron benefiting the Autism Society of Ohio, Greater Akron Chapter. We had salads and pasta and pizza and it was great!!!

Saturday, April 28, we went to Pump It Up with the kids for another ASO event. So - 2p-4p jumping and jumping and sliding!! They had a ball!!! Later that night, we went to Peabody's in Cleveland to see the band Bowling For Soup. It was a lot of fun with some great folks! Got really drunk on Dortmunder Gold - than k you Great Lakes Brewing!

So, two days out of seven. not bad. :)

things to remember

Pumpkin at 3-1/2 is one heck of a natural looking soccer player. We were in the front yard kicking the ball back and forth yesterday evening. That kid just looks like such a jock!!! So cute with her little ponytail and determined look upon her face.

And Big, too! He played with us on Friday evening for a little while - anything to keeo him off the video games for a minute! He was doing some pretty good footwork with the ball. I didn't even know!!!

I guess Bigs doesn't like the soap at school. He is refusing to wash after going to the bathroom. They asked me to send him some soap, but I am not going to. He can rinse off and dry his hands. There's Purell, too, if he needs it.

Pumpkin is making guns out of Legos in school! I think it's fine, but with all the PC'ness and zero tolerance, she might get expelled from preschool - perhaps someone will call the cops on her. Ugh! (eyes rolling) We told her not to do it anymore and she happily reported yesterday that she didn't build any guns today.

Pumpkin and I went to the Root Beer Stand yesterday for dinner. It was great! She was very happy.

"I did all the work!"

Two weeks ago on the Sunday evening at the end of Spring Break, Bigs and I were having our bedtime sttories and such. I lay down with him for a minute or two after we read stories. It's a habit we've had for years. He's usually asleep in thirty seconds or so. Not so this Sunday. He was talking about his Latchkey supervisor, Miss M. To say that he loves her is a gigantic understatement. So he got a little sad and I told him we'd make arrangements to visit Miss M at his old school one day. He was quite sad and thought he'd never see her again. "She lives too far away for me to visit her." Poor guy, he doesn't get that distance is easily covered by this new fangled invention - the automobile.

He was sort of satisfied with the Miss M solution, but still a little weepy. Then he looks at me with his sweet little long face and says, "Why did they move me from Highland? I did all the work!" And proceeded to sob. As did I. I never felt so bad. The school and I had tried to be positive and to support him with this new program that is better than the others. Yet here is my boy, in pain, because he thought HE did something wrong. I reassured and held him fo ra long time that night.

So, yesterday, I finally told the school about this. Not the Miss M stuff, but the other. Here is an email I sent:

Hi, Ladies! How are you? I hope well. I hope you had a good Spring Break!

Something Ben told me on Sunday night before going back to school after break struck me as a little sad and I wasn't exactly sure how to reassure him.

He was crying in bed before lights out and he said, "Mom, why did they have to move me [from Highland]? I did all the work." And then he sobbed. He didn't say, "I want to go back!" or anything like that.

I am afraid he is feeling punished or that he was a bad kid at Highland.

I told him that at Riverview he has teachers that can help him have better days in school and isn't it great that he's been getting 2 happy faces a day?

I just wanted you to be aware in case he got really upset. There's something behind it. Maybe he won't ever say it, but somewhere inside he's thinking it. And it can manifest in many, many ways! (as we all know). Thanks for your time and listening to my worries!

Here are their responses - I have to say - I am VERY VERY pleased with this school system at this moment:

#1 - Hi Kris,  I forwarded your email to [school psychologist] and our behavior consultant.

Poor little guy - we will make sure we get this addressed in social skills group and [psych] may want to pull him out for some one on one time

with her.   Please keep me posted and I will do the same.

#2 - Hi there - We addressed this in social skills group today.  We did a lesson on feeling good about yourself.  We talked about what we like about ourself, etc.  Then, we directly addressed Ben's situation and talked about why he left Highland and came to Riverview.  During group, he didn't verbalize that he was upset about it, but did come over for a few hugs while we were talking about it.  I think it went over well, because one of the boys in the group told Ben that he came to Riverview to be friends with him.  I hope it made him feel a bit better!

#3 - Sure thing!  Ben came in to our group pretty grumpy today and we thought we were going to have a rough time.  One of the boys really made an effort to cheer him up, making faces at him and telling him jokes.  They ended up having a really good time telling knock knock jokes to each other (that were not funny in the slightest....ha!), and finally Ben said, "Alright, alright, I'm fine."  The three boys ended up holding hands at the end, which just cracked us up.